Friday April 19, 2013
Tyler called me absolutely flipping out. I'm glad he calls me when he feels like he can't handle it. I can't really explain how good that makes me feel. He could tell me he loves me 1,000 times a day, and a call from him in times of trouble would mean more to me.
His girlfriend got grounded and because of that, had a meltdown; a kicking, screaming, hysterical meltdown. In response to her overreaction, Tyler got really REALLY mad.
Apparently, he went and saw his psychiatrist and his family doctor in two separate appointments. He told his psychiatrist that he has been taking his Adderal and he also smokes a lot of weed and cigarettes. Upon much discussion, the doctor told Tyler that he will be dead at 45 if he doesn't change his lifestyle. WOW. Tyler talked to him about anti-psychotics, particularly the shot he could get once a month. The Dr. told him that meds will not help his brain function. He told Tyler that every schizophrenic will end up with a degree of brain damage whether or not they take anti-psychotics. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME????? I don't know if the Dr. actually told Ty these things or not. I have no way of knowing because he's 18, and I can't just call the Dr. up anymore. Even if the Dr. didn't say these things - that Ty will end up with brain damage so what's the point of taking meds, and he will be dead by the time he's 45 - Tyler believes he did. I am PISSED.
Anyway, Tyler thinks that because the Dr. said all these things his life is screwed, and his girlfriend is throwing a baby-like fit because she got grounded. He thinks it's so stupid to be upset over being grounded when he has to deal with all of his crap every moment of his life. He just couldn't fathom why she would be so upset. I tried to tell him part of it is just a moody teen girl thing, and she also has mood swings, so that exacerbates the problem. I tried explaining that he has to accept how upset she is and not belittle her feelings - just let her throw her fit. Different people get upset over different things, and it's not our job to try to put into perspective for them mid-fit. I advised him to discuss it with her when they were both calm.
I never know quite what to say when he's so upset that he's screaming at me over the phone for 20 minutes straight. I suggest things that will calm him down like playing with his dogs and deep breathing. Mostly I just let him vent and hopefully that will make him feel better. Although he seems crazed and talks about hurting people and doing impulsive things when he's so angry or stressed, Tyler still has the idea to call his mom. He still has his wits about him, and is able to think of me in a crisis. I am so grateful. I love this kid more than anything in the world and I would do absolutely anything for him. I think he finally believes it.
I have a son that has ADHD and he was taking Adderall XR. He started taking it when he was in 2nd grade and told us he was hearing voices but we never connected the two and his doctor said the voices were probably nothing. Now he is 16 and hears them all the time. We think it was the Adderall XR and so does his doctor. He also has bad thoughts. He sounds like TY but not as extreme but he is only 16. I am praying he does not have schizophrenia. I worked for over 25 years with people with schizophrenia. My son is currently taking Latuda and it is helping. I am also giving him CBD oil. It calms his brain, helps with the thoughts and stops the restlessness. Has Ty tried that? It helps my son with the voices and the restlessness. He also started Intuniv and that has helped with the impulsiveness. I hope TY hangs in there! Schizophrenia is a terrible disease. You should try to get him into a psych rehab program. Many of them have drop in centers that are social outlets which young people need. It is hard on moms as we want to comfort our kids but the disease is impossible.
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